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   The day started out the same as any other summer morning. I awoke at the foot of her bed, still groggy. I checked to see if she had left by whacking the comforter with the plastic box cover that had been resting on her bureau. The blankets collapsed and there was no groan … no Stacia. Again.

            To my discontent, she had to work again today. All for what? Money? She doesn’t buy me anything anyway, so why would I want her to work? Her sister was home, and I didn’t want her to see me, so I escaped out the window and into the backyard.

            I ate a hearty breakfast of leftover potatoes and most of a corn muffin. It was a bit dry, thus I washed it down with a swig of milk … straight from the carton. She would have slapped me on the head had she seen me do that. Oh well. I put my almost finished muffin back in the bag and left it on the countertop.

            I took a stroll down the road to the toad pond. There were a few buggers hopping about, but I couldn’t catch one. There was one big, fat, brown monster of a toad, but he and I had a staring contest. He won, so he leapt back into the water with a kerplunk.

            After my toad hunting expedition, I headed home. I laid beneath her covers all afternoon. I had a dream about a circus.

            Stacia and I visited a circus … In the beginning, we entered a large tent striped with green and cream. Inside, there were headless people, and a giraffe. I wondered how the headless people got around without hitting things or each other. And that was it, unfortunately. I awoke very disappointed. It was utterly confusing. It confused the bejeezus pants off of me. I want a cupcake.

            She arrived home at around 6: 15 pm. Didn’t say “hi” again, but I suppose that’s because of her soreness. She asked me to punch her in the back, and I gladly agreed. She let me hit her four or five times before she yelled at me for punching too hard. And I accidentally hit her head once. Oops!

            After that, she ate dinner and saved me some cucumbers and vinegar. Yum! We ate them together on the floor in her bedroom. I stuck the chopsticks up my nose. She refused to eat off them afterwards. More for me!  

            Now I’m telling you this story, and she’s watching some movie about birds and magic and wolverine. Ooh, what’s this? A journal?

            She heard me and told me not to touch that Crispin or else. I opened it and she lunged at me with a furious gleam in her eyes. I think I may be missing a section of hair on my left arm. Neat. I am now leaving because she is angry and is a complete nerd. I’m greater than the queen of france, and should like to drink tea and eat a trumpet. Stacia informed me that it’s not Trumpet, it’s crumpet. I figure they’re the same and don’t correct myself.

            Secret #2 The vapor from the snake flows indiscreetly through the holes in the vellum sash over Zeus’ left knee. Heed the vaporous stench pot and prevail.


p.s. She doesn't work tomorrow! Fun! Hide and seek at one a.m.!


( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Sep. 3rd, 2007 10:32 pm (UTC)
Hah, the title of this made me chuckle.
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )



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